Why is it that because I am a femme I can only talk about gender in a women the oppressed versus men the oppressor dichotomy? I am not even taken seriously when discussing anything else. I appear to be gender conforming, so what could I possibly know about gender? My place is women’s studies, not gender studies, and even that place is questionable.
I am limited to the ideas set forth by other gender non-conformists; I must regurgitate what they have already done. Anything that I think or say that doesn’t fit within that paradigm is automatically discredited and dismissed. But only letting gender non-conformists write the theory and blaze the trail is like saying only people with heart conditions can be cardiologists, advise people on their heart conditions and perform research in the field.
It’s almost like identifying something that fits with some part of one’s traditional gender roles just isn’t cool anymore – like feeling somewhat comfortable with my assigned gender is so passé.
And while my appearance of femme may match my sex, that doesn’t mean everything about me does. I am not your stereotypical passive femme or woman, for that matter; I am powerfemme. For while I may appear to be a conforming female on the outside, that label certainly doesn’t describe my inside. I do lots of things that men do, but I am labeled a bitch for doing so as a woman.
So keep this in mind: We are all in this together, and we are all oppressed by the gender binary.