Touchdown Jesus rises again

Photo: Touchdown Jesus rises again. Photo source: Cincinnati Enquirer, Google Images

Behold! Jesus has risen again.

And Huggy Jesus is so boring compared to his predecessor.

Touchdown Jesus — the 6-story King of Kings statue emerging from the lake in front of Solid Rock Church on I-75 between Cincinnati and Dayton, Ohio — went from this:

to this:

when a so-called act of God in the form of a bolt of lightning struck the monument. Apparently, Jesus wasn’t made of solid rock but rather styrofoam and fiberglass with a steel frame. Essentially, Jesus was a glorified lightning rod.

The irony of an enormous Jesus statue struck down by lightning kept Southwestern Ohioans busy with witty one liners about the monument resurrecting in three days and worshipping false idols.

The first statue, built in 2004, was so awe-inspiring it drew hundreds of truckers and travelers to the mega-church over the years, according to church leaders.

“This is not a statue that we worship. This is just a lighthouse for travelers.” said Lawrence Bishop II, who pastors the 3,500-member Solid Rock congregation, said to The Cincinnati Enquirer. “We had so many people … that would say that they would drive by and see that and for some unknown reason they would break down to tears and would remember a time in their life when they had a relationship with Jesus. They would pull over their truck and dedicate their life to the Lord.”

Right. Personally, a giant Jesus statue signals to me that I had better skip town, but you know, a symbol of one person’s religious awakening is usually also a symbol of another’s persecution.

But, if God takes requests and happens to read this blog, I would appreciate it if he could take out these billboards on I-71 next time it storms:

Oh, and this abomination needs to go as well:

Pretty please?

3 thoughts on “Touchdown Jesus rises again

  1. I knew I was back in Dayton for the weekend when a friend called me to tell me that Giant Jesus was back on 75. And that top Commandments one also exists on 70 on the way to Columbus. Because if a billboard tells me not to kill somebody, well okay.

  2. Pingback: The Super Bowl Drinking Game That Will Make Your Liver Cringe |

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